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I will be out of the country from Decemeber 18th until January 3rd. More than likely I will have absolutely no internet access. There is internet at one of my grandparents house's but it will be complicated. So I just wanted to wish everyone a Merry Holidays and a Happy New Year.

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On the downside, my grandfather passed away at about 8:50am Indiana time today. So I will be dealing with funeral stuff when I first get over there. My grandmother will also be having surgery to remove cancerous lumps after his funeral so thoughts, prays, and wishes for my family would be greatly appreciated.

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It's been forever since I've posted anything anywhere to be completely honest. Work, school, life has basically over taken me and kicked me in the ass. I'm getting close to opening my second show at Purdue and I'm absolutely terrified. This has been and continues to be the most difficult, thought provoking, painful, exciting, intimidating, vomit inducing show I've ever had the pleasure (I guess you could say that) to be a part of. This is the sort of theatre that I feel like I want, no need to do in my career. The theatre that shoves what it's saying in the audiences faces. The good, the bad, and the incredibly ugly, all laid out to pull up strong emotional responses, and make people question what they're seeing.

The story itself is rather simple. This is the story of what happens to the female inhabitants of Troy after Athena helps the Greeks to build the Trojan Horse, conquer Troy, and end the war. This is not a happy tale. The men and young boys are slaughtered so there can be no revenge. The important women, Hecuba the queen, and her daughters are given as slaves to the important warriors. The rest are distributed by lot to other less important soliders. These women will become common house slaves if they're lucky...if not...concubines for the soldiers until they are too old or the soldiers get bored. The women are imprisoned after having being raped repeatedly by many soldiers, and live in constant fear of another rape. Everytime the door to the prison opens fear consumes them, until they hear the terrible news that enters in the form of Talthybius, messenger for the Greeks, which sink them further and further into despair until there is nothing left but to give up, abandon everything they know, and leave resigned to their fate for the Greek ships. The show is physically, emotionally, and mentally draining and leaves a sour feeling in my stomach whenever I think about it. My only hope is that we do this show as it deserves to be done. To make the audience truly feel for the victims on the other side of a war, to question what happens, and feel compelled to do something to stop these things happening to women in our own time in other parts of the world. Things that happen every day and are happening right now.
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I got this in an email from POWER (Purdue's Organization for Women's Equal Rights)today and it completely shocked me. Anyone reading this male, female, vegetable, mineral needs to go sign this petition and ask others to do the same.


Hi Send this to all your friends. There is NO
WAY a mastectomy should be outpt as it is a massive surgery and insult to
the body. They do not do surgery for male malignancy as outpt. New double
standard???Sign the pledge take up the cause for women.MOM

*PLEASE TAKE THE TIME AND DO THIS.*
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From a nurse: *

I'll never forget the look in my patients eyes when I had to tell them they
had to go home with the drains, new exercises and no breast.
I remember begging the Doctors to keep these women in the hospital longer,
only to hear that they would, but their hands were tied by the insurance
companies.
So there I sat with my patients, giving them the instructions they needed to
take care of themselves, knowing full well they didn't grasp half of what I
was saying, because the glazed, hopeless, frightened look spoke louder than
the quiet 'Thank You they muttered.

A mastectomy is when a woman's breast is removed in order to remove
cancerous breast cells/tissue.
If you know anyone who has had a Mastectomy, you may know that there is a
lot of discomfort and pain afterwards. Insurance companies are trying to
make mastectomies an outpatient procedure.
Let's give women the chance to recover properly in the hospital for 2 days
after surgery.

It takes 2 seconds to do this and is very important .. Please take the time
and do it really quick!
Please send this to everyone in your address book.
If there was ever a time when our voices and choices should be heard, this
is one of those times.
If you're receiving this, it's because I think you will take the 30 seconds
to go to vote on this issue and send it on to others.
You know who will do the same.

There's a bill called the *Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act* which will
require Insurance Companies to cover a minimum 48-hour hospital stay for
patients undergoing a mastectomy. It's about eliminating the 'drive-through
mastectomy' where women are forced to go home just a
few hours after surgery, against the wishes of their doctor, still groggy
from anesthesia and sometimes with drainage tubes still attached.

Lifetime Television has put this bill on their Web page with a petition
drive to show your support. Last year over half the House signed on.

PLEASE!! Sign the petition by clicking on the Web site below. You need not give more than your name and zip code number. *
**
**http://www.lifetimetv.com/breastcancer/petition/signpetition.php
*<http://www.lifetimetv.com/breastcancer/petition/signpetition.php>
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So I sort of had most of my hair cut off on Thursday. I don't mean completely shaved, but it's the shortest its been since I was about 4 years old. I guess you could say it's sort of the pixie cut look only spiky and wild. Mum came to visit me on Thursday and we were talking about how I needed to make a hair appointment for the next time I was up near them with my regular hair dresser. I joked about how I should just cut all of it off and she said why not. We decided to buy hair magazines and go sit in starbucks and decide what I wanted to do. That turned into why didn't I just do it now, so I walked into a shop in the mall, was told it would be a 20 minute wait, picked something out of the book and told Elizabeth, my really fun hairdresser, just to start cutting and do whatever. My hair hasn't been cut since December and was down below my shoulders. Well it doesn't even come close to my shoulders now. And I have bangs, something I haven't had in about 9 years. Everyone who's seen it so far has really liked it and I really do too. Its a really nice change and I feel really good about it. Yay for spur of the moment decisions.
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Well work was interesting last night. Earlier in the night it was a slow Tuesday, but as soon as 8:30 arrived things went a little nuts. I also had a party of about 30 older men from a local choral group downstairs. They spent the whole night singing these amazing 4 part harmonies! They even found a love song most of them knew with my name in it and serenaded me!!! I don't embarass easily but I was blushing and smiling. It was the sweetest thing anyones done for me in a really long time. I was really touched that after they had had a performance and now were just hanging out enjoying each others company that they thought enough of me, a complete stranger, to do that. It was awesome. The night was a little complicated though. A lot of the guys ordered beer/wine, and obviously I'm not 21 yet, and neither was the majority of people working. Luckily Daniel :) one of our shift leaders is and has his liquor license, or things would have gotten interesting. Then one of the registers broke. Then the other server left and it was just me and people kept coming in. 11 here, 6 there, another couple of tables of 3. Ugh crazy. Daniel and Arik were nice enough to bus downstairs for me or i would probably still be there cleaning. Once we closed I found out that the dough roller had gotten a towel stuck in it and had to be taken completely to pieces. I also found out that Lauren, the server who came in at 4, didn't remember to turn off the salad bar so I spent about an hour dumping boiling water on it, and trying to hack away at the huge ice block. I wasn't strong enough to pull up the trays that sit under the ice which would have made it easier. Luckily Daniel came to my rescue. I finally got done at about 12:15 and talked to him for alittle bit and then to his friend Max who works at Purdue West. When we all tried to leave Daniel couldn't get the door locked, so we were banging, pushing, and swearing at the damn thing. Daniel asked me if I'd locked the front doors which I hadn't since thats not my job so he had to run back in and do that. Then after more door fighting he called Voelz, another shift leader who told us how to essentially rig the door to lock. We finally got the damn thing done and I got home at about 1am.
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So the first week of class is over and its going well I guess. We covered Midsummer Nights Dream and next week we're on to Twelfth Night. The discussion is no where near as in depth as I'd hoped for. Its more like a guided discussion based on his questions. I miss Prof. Bross. She made discussing Hamlet interesting and open to any interpretations. Prof. White is a very interesting guy with backgrounds in theatre history which is nice, but this is supposed to be a 400 level class and it doesnt feel any harder than Deerings 241.

I move a week from yesterday. I almost have everything packed up except for the essentials/things that won't fit because I've run out of boxes... I hate the act of moving but im excited to be living so close to campus. It should be an interesting summer. I'm so used to coming home to this apartment, so it will be fun to make another adjustment. Its more convenient living on Marstellar, but I'll be living with 3 other girls eventually, and although matt and i dont talk a whole lot (mainly due to the fact we never see each other lol) at least we dont fight and bitch.
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Well week one of summer is almost over. I've worked almost every night which is good because I need the money. I've realized however, that I don't like it nearly as much as the other Pizza Hut I worked out and I'm not really sure why. The people are all nice for the most part and I'm getting in hours and stuff but it's just not as fun.

I went up to the see the parentals on Wednesday. The only person who had any idea I was going was Dad, so we surprised Mum at lunch and she was really excited. That night me and dad surprised the boys and went into Ft. Wayne and ate amazing Italian at Biaggi's Mmmmmmm. Mum of course was at church. I saw her for about 2 hours after she got off work so we did get to see each other a little. I had breakfast with Amanda on thursday morning which was nice to catch up as I haven't seen her in ages.

Grades came out wednesday and I was scared to look at my Eastern Religions grade and my British Lit grade. I barely went to ER, because it was 3 hours after my other classes, and by the end of the semester I had to so many papers, rehearsals, meetings, etc. that the time was better spent on those than in class. British Lit was scary because the Prof was awful, one of the worst teachers I've ever had, which is saying a lot coming from TVHS. Her grading was inconsistent and irrational, and if you shared and opinion that wasn't hers she counted you wrong. She also doesn't accept excused absences, so my mandatory abscences for ACTF during the first week of school were counted against me, even though I had officail letters from Russ Jones the Chairman of the Theatre Dept. Somehow a miracle occured and I pulled off B's in both of those class. I have no idea how it happend but i'm so glad it did. All A's and B's puts me on the honors list again which placates the parentals and keeps them off my back about things. I almost cried from joy.

Maymester starts Monday, and I have Shakespeare at 9.50. I'm excited about it because it means I'll have something to do all summer besides work and sit around by myself. A lot of my close friends are gone all or part of the summer and a few that are around will be crazy busy. Camron leaves for an Internship in Florida on May 20th. I'm really excited for him but I haven't seen him February and I only get to see him for abot 24hours next week and thats it. Ashley leaves June 10th to work as a summer camp counselor in Ohio. Shes in Huntington working until then so its very unlikely that I'll see her. Laura, Meg, and Tabitha will be in England all of Maymester, and Aziz is back in Kuwait for a few weeks before he moves permenantly to Australia. I really don't know what I'm going to do when my senior year hits. All my theatre friends are a year above so they will have graduated. Laura is a year older but shes only where I am with her Theatre degree, but shes thinking about just going with a theatre minor and a comm bachelors so she can get out of here in 08. I really have no friends in the department, especially with the peoples my age. Atleast I have a year before I have to worry about it.
Current Mood:
contemplative contemplative
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So since I worked last night I made a little bit of money, and went to get meds today. I asked the pharmacist what was best for me to take and after asking me some questions she got me the right meds. She also said that I was coming in just in time as it sounds as though im developing Bronchitis. I have everything except the fever, so I have to be very careful over the next few days or its going to develip into full Bronchitis. If I get a fever or feel worse I have to go straight to the doctor. Luckily I dont have another exam til 7pm tomorrow, so I can spend 24 hours sitting around resting. This whole thing is a pain in the ass. Its expensive and distracting. Grrr
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I want to curl up and die. Or atleast sleep for a very long time. But no, I have an 8am final on 3 religions I don't know, a 2 hour Italian study session, and closing at work, oh and thats just tomorrow. I also have to write notes for my 10am tuesday final somewhere in all that free time I have. While resisting the urge to go into a medicated coma. Oh wait, not an option I have no money for meds! woohoo.
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FUUUUUUUUUCK

That's pretty much it! lol. That's me and my life, royally fucked! I'm still here though

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